Starting again

It is Monday again.  Mondays start out for me full of stress.  My 3 year old son was born with a cleft-lip.  Totally unexpected, he hid his face in all of his ultrasounds, but as a family, we have dealt with it rather well.  He has had two operations to repair the lip and will be looking at a couple more in the future.  One of those will deal with him being hospitalized for surgery which will consist of a bone graft. The specialists all tell me that of all the surgeries he has had or will have, this one will be the easiest.  I get the willies just thinking about it.  He had both of his previous surgeries before he could walk or talk.  He doesn’t even remember them.  This next one between the ages of 6 and 9 he will remember.  I am not looking forward to it. 

Anyway, here at the house, Monday means that the speech therapist will be coming.  Which means that I have oodles of Thomas the Train crap stuff and dinosaurs to pick up in the living room so that there will be at least one clean room in which to host the ST.  Stressor number two is getting the living room to stay cleaned up until the ST gets here.  Stressor number three is knowing that this Monday in particular is the one is which I have chosen to take my life back.  I have spent four years just ambling through doing whatever.  Taking care of my kids, but not myself.  What has that lead to?  Me being overweight, miserable and moody.  So, my journey to myself begins.  I think that I am so afraid of what I might find that I have been putting it off.  That and the thought of exercising makes me tired.  So, that $600.00 catch all in my room a.k.a. the treadmill, will be used. Okay yeah, right now it is being used, to hold wet towels after a shower and the yoga brick and mat I bought five months ago and have used three times.  I will get myself on there today.  But it will have to be after I go buy some new shoelaces for my sneakers.  What happened to the shoelaces you might ask?  That is another story.